A Full Glass of $h!tty Wine is Still a Full Glass of Wine: Why injuries don’t entirely suck.

At this point in time, I think it’s important to disclose the reasoning behind my decision to start this blog. I’ve enlisted the use of the classic pie chart as a visual aid:

Piechart Cropped.png

As you can see by the angry red/orange 30% block, my current status is PUP due to an acute calf/achilles strain and, frankly, it’s worse than paying $12 for a glass of shitty cabernet. But like paying $12 for a glass of shitty cabernet, I must remember that the glass is nonetheless full & that is better than no glass of wine at all… or I wouldn’t have paid $12 for it.

I’ve gone through my many stages of the grieving process over the last 4 weeks and then all of a sudden, this morning… I runcorked! It was mid-deep water jog in a lane next to the mean lady at the Y who looks like a mix of Carlo Rossi and that fish from Spongebob with the large set of periwinkle, frowny lips that kind of look like…(cork it, Stack). For reference (though it’s really not important):

carlo-rossi            +            spongebob-fish

Anyways, I had a revelation that I’m addicted to feeling sorry for myself about my temporary setback. Meanwhile, I’m completely ignoring the many upsides to this whole forced time off situation. If you’re in the same boat, here are some of the reasons why being temporarily injured doesn’t totally suck:

  1. You have a prime opportunity to just enjoy life and try some new things. Do all of those fun things that you couldn’t do before because you didn’t have time or you didn’t want them to interfere with your training. This could be a new form of crosstraining, staying out later than usual, sleeping in, traveling, relaxing or getting white-girl wasted and taking the cinnamon challenge (I do not recommend this).
  2. Nothing will change drastically while you’re on the bench (most likely anyways). You’re running friends and favorite routes are still going to be there when you get healthy. You’re sneakers and gear will be ready for your return and will still work just fine. There will be a million races to sign up for no matter when you’re ready to jump back in. Don’t let your FOMO get the better of you.
  3. You can cheer you face off and have a party on the sidelines. It’s equally fun in it’s own right and your friends will return the favor when you’re back in the game.
  4. The blisters on your feet will start to heal and your toenails grow back, so that you look less and less like a victim from a Saw movie every day that passes. 
  5. You will appreciate each run more when you return, thus enhancing the experience and giving new life to your old training routine. The renewed focus and enjoyment will make it all that much easier to crush your goals. Who says you can’t come back faster and stronger than ever?
  6. Injuries make fantastic scape goats for retail therapy, casual grumpiness, laziness & increased wine intake. Some examples: “Did you seriously buy a $90 pair of sweatpants?”… “Yes. They’re specifically designed for recovery and I just need them right now.” — “Can you take the dog out? I need to stay off of my foot, it’s hurting like a sonofabitch. I’m at about an 8 out of 10 on the pain scale. Thanks.” — “Are you drinking wine? It’s 10am…”… “I woke up and couldn’t run. Then this happened. Deal with it. Here I poured you a glass too.”
  7. You are lucky enough to be able to look forward to running again. There are people who are permanently injured and will never run again. Remember that and be grateful. Like the glass of shitty cabernet, just try to enjoy your temporary situation as much as you can, plan for the future and eventually you’ll crack a new bottle.

Run Fast. Sip Slow. Love Life!

J. Stack

 

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